If i was the character in the book

In the “The Time Traveler’s Wife”, if I can be a time traveler, I must be very upset.  I did not know where I was next second. I would afraid to talk to other, because I may disappear when we were talking.  I had to think of lots of excuse to explain why I just suddenly disappear. There was no choice but lied to others. If the time traveler was not optimistic enough, I guess he may choose to suicide. But if I can control the ability, it would be lots of fun. I could see how my friends and I look in the future. I could know the thing happened many years old. At first, I would feel interesting, but when i know when they will die, it would make me feel desponding, the truth may be blue. At that time, would I like Henry’s daughter still full of sensible, or I would be crazy? It was hard to image. This book is a love story, and I do not know is it a happy ending or not. If Henry did not die this family may full of happiness. Henry appear many years later and give her wife a hug, then he disappeared, gone forever. This was the thing he did many years old. I do not know when someone tell me in the future I was already dead, what will I do. If a person know when will he die what is his mind? Would he shut himself in the home to prevent any danger happening? I have no idea. I thought maybe I would try my best to spend time with the people I care. Maybe I would let one of them know that then this person can tell my family what was going on with me after I dead. But actually it is hard to imagine it. Like Henry’s wife believe him, found a person who can always trust i is very important. That must be lots of pressure if I want to fix this problem by myself. If I could not find a person like that it was easy to give up. When I travel time, i have to find a place which could make me feel safety. And the person who knows my secret could give me some cloths and give me a hand.

If I was the Henry in the book, would I be able to remain clam like him? I hope so.